WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.780 --> 00:00:04.670 ProWritingAid: Hello, everyone! 2 00:00:05.140 --> 00:00:07.780 ProWritingAid: Just give a minute for people to join. 3 00:00:08.540 --> 00:00:14.740 ProWritingAid: My name's Joe. If you can see and hear me, please. Could you drop your name and location in the chat for me. 4 00:00:15.190 --> 00:00:17.889 ProWritingAid: Be great to hear where everybody's connecting from. 5 00:00:20.540 --> 00:00:21.860 ProWritingAid: Hello, Arthur! 6 00:00:22.100 --> 00:00:23.970 ProWritingAid: Arthur in the Netherlands. Hello, Hello. 7 00:00:27.410 --> 00:00:29.130 ProWritingAid: Marie! From Finland! 8 00:00:29.650 --> 00:00:31.990 ProWritingAid: Awesome Jessica in Germany. 9 00:00:32.220 --> 00:00:37.800 ProWritingAid: Aaron, from New Zealand. We've got someone in Atlanta, Arizona, Seattle 10 00:00:38.920 --> 00:00:40.910 ProWritingAid: fantastic. My east coast. 11 00:00:40.910 --> 00:00:45.626 Rona Gofstein: People are too busy at work right now. I'm so sorry, guys. 12 00:00:47.020 --> 00:00:48.369 ProWritingAid: But Calgary, Alberta. 13 00:00:48.370 --> 00:00:51.980 Rona Gofstein: Mokie in Southern California. I'm so sorry. Yes. 14 00:00:53.600 --> 00:00:57.140 ProWritingAid: Idaho, Rosemary in Georgia, Fort Worth. 15 00:00:57.340 --> 00:01:00.080 ProWritingAid: California, Wyoming, fantastic. 16 00:01:00.080 --> 00:01:01.260 Rona Gofstein: My gosh. 17 00:01:02.910 --> 00:01:15.759 ProWritingAid: I'll just give this one or 2 more minutes minutes, folks before just so everybody can join, and then I'll go through the housekeeping rules before we begin. So Hello! From Robin in Scotland. Fantastic new family in Canada. 18 00:01:16.380 --> 00:01:17.620 ProWritingAid: Connecticut. 19 00:01:17.650 --> 00:01:19.820 ProWritingAid: Mexico, but live in LA. 20 00:01:20.440 --> 00:01:24.509 ProWritingAid: Ottawa back all over. It's brilliant, great to see. 21 00:01:25.350 --> 00:01:26.470 Rona Gofstein: That is wonderful. 22 00:01:27.560 --> 00:01:46.700 ProWritingAid: Right, I will start, and to make sure we maximize runner's time. So Hello, everyone. As I said, my name is Joe. I'm from prowriting aid and a big big thank you to everybody for joining us today. Before we get started, we'll just go over a few housekeeping items. So 23 00:01:46.780 --> 00:01:50.330 ProWritingAid: welcome to Science Fiction writers. Week 2024, 24 00:01:51.090 --> 00:01:53.710 ProWritingAid: 1st of all, how to access your replays 25 00:01:53.760 --> 00:02:10.909 ProWritingAid: replays will be added to the Hub page. Once they're done being processed by zoom. This can take a little bit of time, so please don't worry. It will be added as soon as possible, and replays will be available on the prowriting Aid Community Page for all members to view by September 20.th 26 00:02:12.230 --> 00:02:37.710 ProWritingAid: So a few details on our premium day. So Monday to Thursday, sessions are free for everybody to attend, and Friday sessions are limited to premium and premium pro users. Free users can upgrade their accounts by Friday morning in order to gain access and premium and premium pro users, will receive an email on Friday morning with instructions for attending the live sessions and viewing replays. 27 00:02:37.830 --> 00:02:53.089 ProWritingAid: If you are interested in upgrading so that you can attend the premium day. We have an offer for attendees this week for 15% off yearly, providing a premium and premium pro subscriptions. You can upgrade by Friday morning to receive access to the premium Day sessions. 28 00:02:53.530 --> 00:03:02.389 ProWritingAid: and don't worry any kind of links to the hub or links to the discount page. I'll be posting the chat in case you missed them this time around, so don't feel like you have to catch them. Now. 29 00:03:03.670 --> 00:03:18.399 ProWritingAid: if you'd like to keep talking about Science Fiction, you can join our online writing community by using your pro writing aid login here, you can keep talking with other Science Fiction writing fans and keep up to date with more of our writing events at this link here, and I'll be sure to post these in the chat. 30 00:03:19.400 --> 00:03:22.449 ProWritingAid: So some reminders for this session. 31 00:03:22.930 --> 00:03:36.829 ProWritingAid: please use the Q. And A. Box. If you have questions for our speaker, there'll be a section at the end dedicated to some time to Q. And a. But please feel free to post questions throughout the session. If you'd like to chat with other viewers. Please use the chat box instead 32 00:03:36.870 --> 00:03:46.389 ProWritingAid: and links to your offers, and from our speakers will be available on the Science Fiction writers. Week Hub, which you can find here. And again I'll be sure to drop that link 33 00:03:46.430 --> 00:03:48.719 ProWritingAid: in the chat. So 34 00:03:49.140 --> 00:04:02.939 ProWritingAid: I will now introduce our wonderful speaker for today. So today we are joined by Rona Gofstein. Rona is a published author and an author, accelerator, certified fiction book, coach, who loves working with writers of heroin driven fiction. 35 00:04:02.940 --> 00:04:30.240 ProWritingAid: She describes her style as an intensive feedback, combined with compassionate enthusiasm because she knows that on this journey writers need clarity, support, and encouragement. She has spoken on writing craft and business across the country, and is the past president of the New Hampshire Rwa. Chapter and Broad Universe. She lives in Massachusetts with her husband and sons, and misses the 24 h diners of her home. State of New Jersey. 36 00:04:30.240 --> 00:04:49.649 ProWritingAid: a proud Gen. Xer, who's been published since 2,007, and you can learn her pen name if you work together. She's always up for getting a coffee, talking about movies and finding great places to eat. So without further ado, I will hand over for what I'm sure will be a fantastic session. Away we go. 37 00:04:49.990 --> 00:04:56.669 Rona Gofstein: Oh, no pressure, no pressure. All right. I'm gonna share my screen with all of you now. And 38 00:04:56.710 --> 00:05:17.380 Rona Gofstein: welcome and thank you for that wonderful introduction welcome to the Tent Poll revision process. This hopefully will be a great way for you to learn how to get into your draft and give it a 1st revision that is more effective than what you might have been doing or hearing in the past. 39 00:05:18.260 --> 00:05:18.960 Rona Gofstein: Whoops! 40 00:05:19.999 --> 00:05:43.810 Rona Gofstein: Before I get started. I want to know a little bit about who I I got to see who all of you, where you are, but just quickly. And then I'm gonna stop looking at the chat, because otherwise I will get distracted. Tell me a little bit about where you are in the draft, in the writing process. So who here is drafting, revising, or polishing. Those are different stages, maybe. How you feel about revisions. 41 00:05:44.090 --> 00:05:51.579 Rona Gofstein: Well, you love them, you hate them. You're dreading them. And is there anything in particular 42 00:05:52.330 --> 00:06:01.960 Rona Gofstein: that you're hoping to learn for today? 1st drafts? I've got writers. I've got folks, 90% of the way through. Very exciting. 43 00:06:02.930 --> 00:06:06.039 Rona Gofstein: Still, in the plotting phase, scared of editing. Okay, I feel that 44 00:06:06.250 --> 00:06:13.239 Rona Gofstein: reach out. I can help pre-writing. Pre-writing is so much. I I'm a brainstorm kind of gal. I'm good with that. Oh. 45 00:06:14.500 --> 00:06:22.160 Rona Gofstein: words, Lisa, that's wonderful dreading them. Okay, don't. Don't be terrified, Nicole. We can make this work for you. 46 00:06:22.440 --> 00:06:24.400 Rona Gofstein: We can find systems that work for you. 47 00:06:25.030 --> 00:06:44.262 Rona Gofstein: getting your M. Your manager back from your editor and afraid. Yeah, okay, breathe, Diana. Breathe. Yes, that is a scary place, all right. There's a lot of dread. All right, I'm I'm gonna close the chat box. I'm sorry for all the dread. I'm gonna see if I if I can help a little bit with that that dread, or at least get you through it. 48 00:06:45.240 --> 00:07:00.361 Rona Gofstein: Tada, there's me! Look me with my mug, me with my mug and everything that Joe just told you about. I, have been published since 1,997. I'm currently self publishing, but I have been traditionally published with small presses before. 49 00:07:00.770 --> 00:07:17.290 Rona Gofstein: I do feel my superpower as a coach is to help you as the writer stay inspired through this process so that you can create vivid characters with strong arcs and bring those to the world. And yes, please don't talk to me before the coffee. 50 00:07:17.910 --> 00:07:19.160 Rona Gofstein: All right. 51 00:07:19.210 --> 00:07:35.469 Rona Gofstein: Thank you for being here, for those of you who are here live great job. Thanks for taking time out of your day for doing this. If you're watching this on the recording that that might be good, because I will probably be leaning into my Jersey girl and talking at about 1.5 speed. So 52 00:07:35.740 --> 00:07:37.106 Rona Gofstein: hang on 53 00:07:38.390 --> 00:07:52.229 Rona Gofstein: reminder again. Put your questions in the QA. When you think of them. Okay, if if you think of something, just pop that right in there, and I will get to it at the end. I just don't want you to forget if you do forget and come up with something later. I will give you a way to reach out to me. 54 00:07:52.320 --> 00:08:02.840 Rona Gofstein: So what I'm covering today is I don't know why this keeps moving what your main characters will need to carry them through the story, because 55 00:08:02.940 --> 00:08:12.360 Rona Gofstein: they need something to be in there in each scene. So I'm going to go through that 1st before we discuss the actual tent pole scenes that are there that are going to hold up your manuscript. 56 00:08:12.610 --> 00:08:23.070 Rona Gofstein: Once we discuss when we get to discussing each of those scenes we're going to talk about. I'm going to talk about how to use them to edit the book and how this is going to help future rounds of revisions because 57 00:08:23.480 --> 00:08:36.719 Rona Gofstein: deep breath, it's going to take more than one round of revisions. Also 2 bonuses at the end. So 1st of all, for those of you who have finished a draft. Congratulations. Okay, no small achievement. 58 00:08:36.990 --> 00:08:48.200 Rona Gofstein: Big deal. I mean, I'm sure you guys have heard the numbers on people who say they want to write a book and then actually do it. Not a lot of them complete it. So great job. And those of you who are in the drafting process keep 59 00:08:48.390 --> 00:08:49.260 Rona Gofstein: going. 60 00:08:49.896 --> 00:08:54.530 Rona Gofstein: So guess what? It's time for. Yeah. More work. So 61 00:08:54.580 --> 00:09:12.850 Rona Gofstein: most writers, when they get to the editing stage, start with a page by page process. They go through the book linearly, and they focus in that way on language generally over structure and page by page can make it very difficult for you to see what's working 62 00:09:12.880 --> 00:09:16.179 Rona Gofstein: in the story as a whole beyond the moment that you're in 63 00:09:17.690 --> 00:09:22.580 Rona Gofstein: you also tend to be so close to your work. You miss the bigger picture 64 00:09:22.820 --> 00:09:39.100 Rona Gofstein: of where the book is holding together. So most writers suffer from something we call burden of knowledge. So you know what your character is thinking, feeling going through. You probably know the back story, and who and what they were before they got to this moment. 65 00:09:39.750 --> 00:09:57.859 Rona Gofstein: But have you actually put that on the page? Because just because it's in your head doesn't mean it's there for the reader yet. We know what's supposed to happen in the scene, but we don't always notice that we haven't allowed the reader to see that yet. 66 00:09:57.940 --> 00:10:07.920 Rona Gofstein: So language and phrasing are for a later revision, because, first, st you have to make sure the story as a whole is really, really there. 67 00:10:09.500 --> 00:10:14.180 Rona Gofstein: So how do you make sure the story is there. This is this, this is the 68 00:10:14.290 --> 00:10:20.109 Rona Gofstein: way that this program works. This is the way 10 Pole works. It allows you to look at the whole. 69 00:10:21.310 --> 00:10:22.110 Rona Gofstein: eat. 70 00:10:22.840 --> 00:10:26.340 Rona Gofstein: The other problem with revising on a line by line basis 71 00:10:26.990 --> 00:10:35.220 Rona Gofstein: is that you will frequently get dogged, bogged down at the beginning and revising the opening scene or the opening chapter, or the opening few chapters, and you never get to the end. 72 00:10:35.756 --> 00:10:50.070 Rona Gofstein: And in Science Fiction we? Sometimes we're writing some long books. So you you want to get to the end? That's going to be key. So what is the tent pole revision process. It is first, st 73 00:10:50.330 --> 00:11:09.909 Rona Gofstein: a way to do a 1st pass revision that allows you to get that higher level vision of your book. This is the reason many people do work with an editor. It's a reason a lot of people work with me as a coach is because I can kind of look down in the way that you're not able to. That's a different kind of perspective, and 74 00:11:09.910 --> 00:11:27.932 Rona Gofstein: it's hard to switch out of from drafting mode to editing mode and change that perspective. You don't want to be as close to your story in the same way you want to detach from the flow and be able to look at the structure. I am having serious light issues, apologies to those watching. 75 00:11:28.530 --> 00:11:39.980 Rona Gofstein: you you don't want to get stuck up a caught in this incredible world you've built, and this wonderful language you've used, and not able to see whether or not your key sees or scenes are holding up. 76 00:11:40.560 --> 00:12:00.559 Rona Gofstein: moving through quickly can be helpful as you make the transition from drafting to editing, because you need that different mindset. Remember when you when you draft a book you're writing the book for you. But when you edit, you're starting to craft a book for readers so different mindset, different process. 77 00:12:00.780 --> 00:12:20.940 Rona Gofstein: And while this might at 1st not feel like a quote unquote, real revision, because you haven't gone through every scene. Trust me when I tell you it is. There's a lot of power to these scenes. They are the ones, as I said, holding up your book, so by making sure they are strong, you're going to be able to make sure that the book works as a whole. 78 00:12:21.910 --> 00:12:35.755 Rona Gofstein: Alright, I saw a lot of people talking about how much they were dreading, editing, what they're worried about, what they're nervous about. I will do some quick disclaimers. No one process works for everybody, and if anybody tells you this is the way to do it. 79 00:12:36.300 --> 00:12:43.389 Rona Gofstein: question that it. This is the way they do it. This is the way that works for them. It won't work for everybody. 80 00:12:43.758 --> 00:12:48.839 Rona Gofstein: If you're somebody who prefers to edit while you write or has been editing. While you write. 81 00:12:49.000 --> 00:13:02.739 Rona Gofstein: this process can work in a way that it will allow you to stop and think about where your last 10 pole scene was, or maybe where your next one is coming, and it may help you to keep going, so it'll help you to back up and maybe go forward. 82 00:13:04.380 --> 00:13:12.859 Rona Gofstein: So when you're stuck, this might be something that helps. So today, please take what works for you. Disregard the rest. Not going to take it personally. 83 00:13:13.230 --> 00:13:31.910 Rona Gofstein: All right. We're starting with the things your character needs, and if you haven't found this book by Deborah Dixon, I highly recommend your goal, motivation and conflict. The additional one is stakes, which I will talk a little bit about, but these are the components that are going to need to be on the page to make sure your key scenes are working. 84 00:13:31.990 --> 00:13:49.740 Rona Gofstein: your character's goal, their motivation, their conflict, and what they're going to possibly lose if they don't get these is going to need to be on the page. It's going to be need to be changing, growing, moving as they go forward. I'm going to talk a lot about these as we go on, because this is how you show the characters arc of change. 85 00:13:50.079 --> 00:14:14.839 Rona Gofstein: Most often this is a positive arc. Things get better, the heat person gets rescued, the Empire is defeated, the bomb is turned off. Whatever it needs to be done is done, you could also be writing something that is more tragic. So you have a negative character arc or a sacrificial character arc. You also could be writing a character with a flat arc. They are going to stay solid and steady 86 00:14:14.850 --> 00:14:23.169 Rona Gofstein: as the world changes around them. You see this a lot in superheroes, Captain America. Wonder, woman, they don't really change as the chaos spins around them. 87 00:14:23.420 --> 00:14:32.969 Rona Gofstein: But you want to know your characters. Make sure you're clear before you go into the revision process because you might not have stopped to do this beforehand to know what your character's goal is. 88 00:14:33.050 --> 00:14:37.689 Rona Gofstein: what they want internally and externally. You'll see that at the bottom the readers need both. 89 00:14:37.900 --> 00:14:41.059 Rona Gofstein: So what their motivation is, why they want it. 90 00:14:41.320 --> 00:14:43.630 Rona Gofstein: Save the planet. Save the child. 91 00:14:44.501 --> 00:14:49.360 Rona Gofstein: Get dinner on the table conflict. What's getting in their way. 92 00:14:49.660 --> 00:15:03.799 Rona Gofstein: and what they will lose the stakes, what they will lose, or what they fear they will lose if they don't get the goal, and sometimes that's something tangible like their home, or something intangible, like autonomy. All of those things are things that can be at stake. 93 00:15:03.900 --> 00:15:09.819 Rona Gofstein: But as we go through the 10 pull scenes, I'm going to ask you to look at where your characters goals are 94 00:15:09.880 --> 00:15:12.200 Rona Gofstein: as they are going along. 95 00:15:12.630 --> 00:15:16.360 Rona Gofstein: The other thing I strongly feel your characters need. 96 00:15:17.060 --> 00:15:22.930 Rona Gofstein: or you want to know about your characters, whether or not you've known it before you wrote, or you're starting to discover it. Now that the book is finished 97 00:15:23.020 --> 00:15:45.449 Rona Gofstein: is their wound, their lie, and what they need to learn, by the way, cannot say enough about Angela, Ackerman and Becca Puglisi's Thesaurus Thesaurus I. The whole series is is great and one stop for writers, their online community and software worth the investment a great way to deepen your characters and make sure things are getting on the page. 98 00:15:45.560 --> 00:15:47.690 Rona Gofstein: Okay, so wound is 99 00:15:47.970 --> 00:15:53.353 Rona Gofstein: that time in their backstory somebody was talking about developing a world and developing their characters. 100 00:15:54.120 --> 00:15:56.950 Rona Gofstein: something that hurt them and created a false belief. 101 00:15:57.290 --> 00:16:02.309 Rona Gofstein: So they've learned that somebody, you know, they've lost somebody special when they were young. 102 00:16:02.764 --> 00:16:13.719 Rona Gofstein: That's created. That's that's 1 of the reasons why we have so many orphans. It's a great great, she says in quotes wound. It's likely a big part of the reason for what they're 103 00:16:13.790 --> 00:16:16.140 Rona Gofstein: external and internal goals are. 104 00:16:16.160 --> 00:16:27.649 Rona Gofstein: For example, if the wound has has come around money and not having enough of it, then they may have an external goal around success, and being self reliant, they may have an internal goal around self worth 105 00:16:27.890 --> 00:16:29.440 Rona Gofstein: and acceptance. 106 00:16:30.270 --> 00:16:39.949 Rona Gofstein: So the lie is the false belief that grows out of the wound. I'll never find my place in the world. Nobody wants me, nothing lasts, everything is 107 00:16:40.100 --> 00:16:47.810 Rona Gofstein: destructible. If if you go back to the money thing, they may falsely believe money would solve all their problems. 108 00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:50.459 Rona Gofstein: Guess what they're going to learn. 109 00:16:50.700 --> 00:16:56.869 Rona Gofstein: I mean, they need to learn about the world or themselves that are going to help them get their external and their internal goals. 110 00:16:59.150 --> 00:17:12.180 Rona Gofstein: usually you know what they need to learn. They they think they need to learn one thing for the external goal. What they really need is to learn something else, which is what gets them, their internal goal, which tends to be bigger and sometimes changes the external goal. 111 00:17:12.230 --> 00:17:20.849 Rona Gofstein: They need to accept support. That money doesn't make them a success, that there are other kinds of success. That means means more. There are endless ways to 112 00:17:20.920 --> 00:17:25.720 Rona Gofstein: layer this in for your character, so that they grow and change and 113 00:17:25.750 --> 00:17:27.130 Rona Gofstein: become 114 00:17:27.517 --> 00:17:29.720 Rona Gofstein: the characters who are going to 115 00:17:30.140 --> 00:17:35.840 Rona Gofstein: face the big, bad, and conquer all at the end of either your book or series depending on how you're writing it. 116 00:17:36.900 --> 00:17:41.069 Rona Gofstein: All right, let's start to get into the tent polls themselves. 117 00:17:41.110 --> 00:17:49.669 Rona Gofstein: So Pixar has 22 rules of storytelling. They're really good. By the way, I highly recommend looking them up. And here's Number 4. 118 00:17:49.780 --> 00:17:57.939 Rona Gofstein: It is the basic structure of story, and it is pretty much true for every story out there, and it goes a little like this. Once upon a time there was 119 00:17:59.300 --> 00:18:05.649 Rona Gofstein: every day this person or robot or cyborg does something 120 00:18:06.390 --> 00:18:07.610 Rona Gofstein: one day 121 00:18:08.210 --> 00:18:09.899 Rona Gofstein: something else happens 122 00:18:11.260 --> 00:18:12.870 Rona Gofstein: because of that. 123 00:18:13.210 --> 00:18:14.919 Rona Gofstein: something else happens. 124 00:18:15.220 --> 00:18:18.260 Rona Gofstein: And because of that, something else happens. 125 00:18:18.490 --> 00:18:20.110 Rona Gofstein: Until finally 126 00:18:20.560 --> 00:18:22.889 Rona Gofstein: something big happens. 127 00:18:23.360 --> 00:18:26.449 Rona Gofstein: And every day ever since that day. 128 00:18:27.710 --> 00:18:28.800 Rona Gofstein: the end 129 00:18:30.100 --> 00:18:31.660 Rona Gofstein: so obviously 130 00:18:31.690 --> 00:18:33.580 Rona Gofstein: over the course of a full book. 131 00:18:33.660 --> 00:18:39.639 Rona Gofstein: The there are many, many, many because of that. But for our purposes today 132 00:18:39.650 --> 00:18:42.950 Rona Gofstein: the answers to each of these lines is going to show you 133 00:18:43.010 --> 00:18:45.400 Rona Gofstein: your tent pole scenes. 134 00:18:46.880 --> 00:18:55.089 Rona Gofstein: So when you're writing your full story, there's again lots of the because of that. We're going to focus on some key ones. So once upon a time there was, is your opening scene. 135 00:18:55.370 --> 00:18:59.259 Rona Gofstein: Once upon a time there was a cowboy toy, who was a boys favorite. 136 00:19:00.090 --> 00:19:02.100 Rona Gofstein: We'll we'll stick with Pixar for this one 137 00:19:02.710 --> 00:19:05.120 Rona Gofstein: every day. The boy played with the toy 138 00:19:06.220 --> 00:19:13.050 Rona Gofstein: one day shortly before the boy was supposed to move. He got a new toy. He loved a lot, and the cowboy got jealous. 139 00:19:13.790 --> 00:19:23.569 Rona Gofstein: Now we're moving into story, and you can already start to hear who would. He is and what his goal might be, and what's important to him. And the jealousy becomes a wound 140 00:19:25.190 --> 00:19:26.830 Rona Gofstein: because of that. 141 00:19:26.970 --> 00:19:34.700 Rona Gofstein: Now we're going to get into rising action all right. Because of that. The old toy did everything he could to get rid of the new toy 142 00:19:35.000 --> 00:19:38.489 Rona Gofstein: that sums up a lot of the next, because of that. 143 00:19:40.010 --> 00:19:41.490 Rona Gofstein: because of that 144 00:19:41.740 --> 00:19:48.240 Rona Gofstein: they end up getting left at a gas station, and now they must work together to get back home. 145 00:19:49.810 --> 00:19:58.790 Rona Gofstein: until finally, on moving day, they are forced through a series of near death experiences a rocket, remote control car, needing to light the rocket. All that 146 00:19:59.010 --> 00:20:03.350 Rona Gofstein: that leads them to land that leads them close to the boy's car 147 00:20:03.900 --> 00:20:11.309 Rona Gofstein: and finally landing in it. And ever since that day they are friends, happy to share the boy and be part of their toy community. 148 00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:17.410 Rona Gofstein: Now, are there other important scenes in your story in this movie in any story? 149 00:20:17.710 --> 00:20:18.720 Rona Gofstein: Sure. 150 00:20:18.750 --> 00:20:33.619 Rona Gofstein: But I think you can tell from what I just showed you, especially if you know the book, the movie. These are really the ones that are holding up the whole rest of the book, and you can see how the story is going to progress from there. 151 00:20:34.630 --> 00:20:35.590 Rona Gofstein: So 152 00:20:35.910 --> 00:20:49.257 Rona Gofstein: for those of you, I'm going to give you like 2 min, because this is recorded and somebody's gonna have to spin this faster. But to see if you can write down your answers to rule number 4 for those of you who completed or near completed a manuscript. 153 00:20:49.690 --> 00:20:55.699 Rona Gofstein: write what you think fits all right to one or 2 sentences describing your opening scene. 154 00:20:57.550 --> 00:21:01.600 Rona Gofstein: your hook, your inciting incident. What gets things moving? 155 00:21:02.700 --> 00:21:10.159 Rona Gofstein: By the way, those can be right on top of each other. If you ever read the Martian. You know, it starts with an opening line that basically says, I am completely. 156 00:21:10.760 --> 00:21:14.970 Rona Gofstein: We are right in the thick of things on that one. So your 157 00:21:15.320 --> 00:21:20.039 Rona Gofstein: your opening scene and your hook and signing incident may be very, very close together. That's okay. 158 00:21:20.960 --> 00:21:22.810 Rona Gofstein: Just have slightly different shaped tent. 159 00:21:24.800 --> 00:21:27.720 Rona Gofstein: because of that. So how do things get moving? 160 00:21:29.570 --> 00:21:38.799 Rona Gofstein: What leads up to that midpoint moment where things start to change and your character goes from? And I'll discuss this a little more when I get there. Where your character goes from 161 00:21:39.400 --> 00:21:43.320 Rona Gofstein: reactive to proactive is usually what happens at the midpoint 162 00:21:43.340 --> 00:21:51.060 Rona Gofstein: they suddenly take on. You know, they've been kind of like going along like. Yep, I have to do this, and now I have to do this, and now I have to do something. 163 00:21:53.800 --> 00:22:01.667 Rona Gofstein: think about your dark moment whenever the all hope is lost. Dark night of the soul depending on on which, you know if you use different 164 00:22:02.936 --> 00:22:04.410 Rona Gofstein: plotting forms. 165 00:22:05.880 --> 00:22:11.029 Rona Gofstein: it's usually right between. If you're if you're an act person, it's like right at the beginning of Act 3 somewhere in there. 166 00:22:11.480 --> 00:22:24.570 Rona Gofstein: I will tell you this, though, if you're sitting here and you're thinking about your story, and you really can't come up with something that would fit into any of these key things. You may have some very important information right there. Your story may be missing something 167 00:22:24.580 --> 00:22:26.450 Rona Gofstein: that it needs to keep 168 00:22:26.580 --> 00:22:35.609 Rona Gofstein: pulling the reader through, because that's what these tent pull scenes do. They are the key scenes that are pulling your reader through the book. They are. What's making them 169 00:22:35.920 --> 00:22:38.869 Rona Gofstein: turn and keep turning the page. 170 00:22:41.230 --> 00:22:42.080 Rona Gofstein: All right. 171 00:22:42.640 --> 00:22:49.300 Rona Gofstein: I'm going really fast. Remember to keep popping things into the chat, not to the chat into the QA. If you have questions for me. 172 00:22:49.460 --> 00:22:50.340 Rona Gofstein: All right. 173 00:22:50.580 --> 00:22:52.970 Rona Gofstein: I hope you guys have got a few things down. 174 00:22:54.410 --> 00:23:12.349 Rona Gofstein: This is this is the tent. Ta da. I really apologize, by the way for my folks like me, who want everything to line up perfectly. I couldn't find a 6 pole tent, so I tacked this this guy on here at the end. So opening. Scene inciting incident, rising action, midpoint. Dark moment. Conclusion. 175 00:23:12.785 --> 00:23:20.340 Rona Gofstein: Yes, I'm going to hammer these. These are the 10 poles. So this is kind of what it looks like, and I know the novel's not in the center, and it bugs me, too. 176 00:23:21.150 --> 00:23:34.119 Rona Gofstein: All right. Before I go on, you're going to hear a phrase repeated continually from here on through. Is it? On the page, I think, as a coach, one of the phrases I use the most is the word yet, because 177 00:23:34.260 --> 00:24:03.879 Rona Gofstein: you know, the suspense isn't there yet the emotion isn't there yet. The growth isn't there yet you may know it, and I may sense that you know it, but if I can't see it on the page, then your reader can't know it. So when we get to each of these scenes. You're going to see me asking you to remind yourself to look at it in such a way to make sure that what you want the reader to know is actually on the page. And again, that's 1 of the advantage of just pulling these scenes out. You're not going to get as caught up 178 00:24:03.880 --> 00:24:08.920 Rona Gofstein: in the whole flow. And the world building you've done, which I don't doubt is brilliant. 179 00:24:09.100 --> 00:24:14.230 Rona Gofstein: but it's not necessarily going to help you with this 1st revision. 180 00:24:15.450 --> 00:24:22.519 Rona Gofstein: All right, let's look at the the 10 poles individually, the opening scene. What needs to happen? You need to introduce your main character. 181 00:24:22.770 --> 00:24:38.130 Rona Gofstein: I realize this could be plural for some of you, and this could be a villain for as well for some of you. But that's what needs to be there in the opening scene. You're going to make sure you know who they are at the beginning, and that your reader can see at least the beginnings of their goal. 182 00:24:38.390 --> 00:24:40.430 Rona Gofstein: and probably their motivation. 183 00:24:41.010 --> 00:24:47.459 Rona Gofstein: There may be a hint at the conflict in their lives. And what's getting in their way of that Con, you know of them getting that goal. 184 00:24:47.570 --> 00:24:49.229 Rona Gofstein: You know. Luke has to go 185 00:24:49.240 --> 00:24:52.860 Rona Gofstein: plant field plants in the fields. He can't go to 186 00:24:53.180 --> 00:24:56.154 Rona Gofstein: Tanchi station to pick up power converters. 187 00:24:57.180 --> 00:25:03.510 Rona Gofstein: this is what you're launching with. This is what's bringing the reader in. You want to make it as clear and interesting as you can. 188 00:25:03.806 --> 00:25:12.519 Rona Gofstein: This is what's going to draw the reader in. This is what's going to draw an agent in, if that's what you are looking for. If you wanted to be in traditional publishing. So 189 00:25:12.530 --> 00:25:14.239 Rona Gofstein: you're going to 190 00:25:14.270 --> 00:25:18.530 Rona Gofstein: make sure you give the reason. The reader excuse me a reason to connect with 191 00:25:19.110 --> 00:25:37.434 Rona Gofstein: and like or understand the main character, and I say that because they don't have to necessarily like them, we just need to understand them. Sometimes we do start with an unlikable, grumpy main character, and we don't like them@firstst there's so much out there now with with anti heroes. 192 00:25:37.980 --> 00:25:39.910 Rona Gofstein: But they need to be compelling 193 00:25:40.351 --> 00:25:46.899 Rona Gofstein: and then, now that you've also done this, and hopefully you're doing this. If you're doing this, I should say, after your whole book is completed. 194 00:25:47.270 --> 00:25:52.649 Rona Gofstein: ask yourself. Are you starting the book in the most compelling and interesting place? 195 00:25:53.350 --> 00:25:55.520 Rona Gofstein: Or is that place 2 or 3 chapters in? 196 00:25:56.110 --> 00:25:58.830 Rona Gofstein: I have a friend who always writes 3 chapters that he junks. 197 00:25:59.200 --> 00:26:00.490 Rona Gofstein: and those are for him. 198 00:26:00.940 --> 00:26:10.310 Rona Gofstein: He had to write the book for him, but when he's crafting it for the reader, the first, st almost the 1st 3 chapters almost universally seem to go once it was only 2. 199 00:26:11.000 --> 00:26:18.960 Rona Gofstein: but make sure you're starting at the right place now that you have a chance to look at the whole booker. Now that you know where it kind of ends, make sure you're starting 200 00:26:19.040 --> 00:26:21.000 Rona Gofstein: in the right place. 201 00:26:22.350 --> 00:26:31.629 Rona Gofstein: So beginnings of the goal motivation, conflict. If you can hint at the wound, if you can hint at the lie, all those things start to be, see what you are layering in. 202 00:26:32.360 --> 00:26:35.230 Rona Gofstein: All right, your hook an inciting incident. 203 00:26:35.240 --> 00:26:41.170 Rona Gofstein: The Mc. Your main character is put in motion. You've set the stage. We are in the world? 204 00:26:41.280 --> 00:26:44.910 Rona Gofstein: Where is the character starting to get moving? 205 00:26:45.570 --> 00:26:46.630 Rona Gofstein: So 206 00:26:47.300 --> 00:26:53.367 Rona Gofstein: what puts them in motion? Is it? Is it the goal that puts them in motion? Is it the conflict that puts them in motion? 207 00:26:54.290 --> 00:27:03.019 Rona Gofstein: Is, are they forced into doing something that is against their original goal? Is that suddenly starting to be is that starting to come up with it? 208 00:27:06.700 --> 00:27:13.750 Rona Gofstein: What decision does the main character have to make right now because of this moment? That's going to draw the reader forward. 209 00:27:14.190 --> 00:27:19.019 Rona Gofstein: Remember your goal as an author is to get the reader to keep turning pages. 210 00:27:19.180 --> 00:27:20.259 Rona Gofstein: That's our job. 211 00:27:20.930 --> 00:27:22.980 Rona Gofstein: Get them to keep turning pages. 212 00:27:24.070 --> 00:27:38.839 Rona Gofstein: So this is a place where a lot of writers I work with start to notice that maybe there's some action on the page, but there may not be a motion on the page. So check for that as well. So while you're doing the action check to make sure like how it's affecting the character, is there 213 00:27:38.860 --> 00:27:48.910 Rona Gofstein: as well, because every one of these beats changes them. It changes what they're doing. And it's probably changing how they're feeling, whether it's about the world or themselves that is entirely up to you. 214 00:27:50.110 --> 00:27:58.810 Rona Gofstein: What meaning are they making of this moment? You know it's not just that their aunt and uncle were killed by the Empire. But it's right. After he turned down 215 00:27:59.020 --> 00:28:02.019 Rona Gofstein: a chance to be to study and become a Jedi. 216 00:28:02.290 --> 00:28:06.550 Rona Gofstein: He he was about to choose the life his uncle wanted for him. And now 217 00:28:06.820 --> 00:28:10.101 Rona Gofstein: the the world, the big world, has actually come for him. 218 00:28:10.460 --> 00:28:19.439 Rona Gofstein: And a reminder, too. These you're hooking and sighting incident, and your opening could be very, very close. You may have very few scenes between, if any, between these 2. 219 00:28:19.880 --> 00:28:23.700 Rona Gofstein: just because you have fewer scenes between them doesn't mean you have fewer tent polls, though, so 220 00:28:24.660 --> 00:28:27.540 Rona Gofstein: make sure that you're clear on this. 221 00:28:27.920 --> 00:28:29.146 Rona Gofstein: remember, for 222 00:28:30.200 --> 00:28:35.240 Rona Gofstein: The decision the main character is making making sure it's compelling. 223 00:28:35.510 --> 00:28:39.020 Rona Gofstein: and make sure it's on the page. Those are the things to ask yourself 224 00:28:39.700 --> 00:28:43.339 Rona Gofstein: is, what's pulling him forward compelling? And is it on the page. 225 00:28:45.040 --> 00:28:47.439 Rona Gofstein: All right. Rising action. 226 00:28:47.480 --> 00:28:57.959 Rona Gofstein: Your main character makes an important decision, usually something under their control. So this was, this is probably easier. Woody, pushing buzz out the window is kind of an easy, you know 227 00:28:58.300 --> 00:29:03.544 Rona Gofstein: thing, and then go having to go after him a little bit harder. But now he's taking some responsibility. 228 00:29:04.280 --> 00:29:16.950 Rona Gofstein: so this is where plotin point, what's happening and what's changing is really starting to get going. So we see this, we see the the character doing, and then we also see the actions affecting him. So you're going to look at 229 00:29:17.340 --> 00:29:22.639 Rona Gofstein: is the decision and the actions happening during this scene? Are they in line 230 00:29:22.670 --> 00:29:24.199 Rona Gofstein: with the character's goal 231 00:29:24.480 --> 00:29:26.070 Rona Gofstein: and the wound, and lie 232 00:29:26.350 --> 00:29:31.910 Rona Gofstein: because they still believe that at this point it's going to be a long time till they don't believe it. 233 00:29:32.210 --> 00:29:34.305 Rona Gofstein: Hint it's the end. 234 00:29:35.340 --> 00:29:39.820 Rona Gofstein: How is this rising accident? Action affecting their internal and external 235 00:29:40.720 --> 00:29:41.930 Rona Gofstein: gmc. 236 00:29:42.220 --> 00:29:46.299 Rona Gofstein: is it pushing the conflict? Is it pushing their motivation? Is it rubbing up against? 237 00:29:46.910 --> 00:29:48.260 Rona Gofstein: Something like that 238 00:29:49.730 --> 00:29:53.230 Rona Gofstein: is this decision that happens? Here is the action that happens here. 239 00:29:54.800 --> 00:30:02.250 Rona Gofstein: something that will keep the reader turning pages is, you know, this is not a this is not a point of, and he decides to, you know, order, takeout 240 00:30:03.072 --> 00:30:07.689 Rona Gofstein: you know, I'll go back to the Martian. This is when he figures out. He can probably plant food. 241 00:30:07.720 --> 00:30:11.740 Rona Gofstein: you know. He's got to start solving problems, and the 1st is 242 00:30:12.170 --> 00:30:13.750 Rona Gofstein: having enough food to eat. 243 00:30:13.830 --> 00:30:17.359 Rona Gofstein: So the rising action is really putting the story in motion. 244 00:30:18.490 --> 00:30:26.290 Rona Gofstein: having making sure that it's compelling emotionally, and action wise the characters. Internal reaction to this decision is on the page. 245 00:30:26.710 --> 00:30:31.450 Rona Gofstein: He may be very torn. He may not want to make this decision. He may feel forced into this decision. 246 00:30:33.410 --> 00:30:45.170 Rona Gofstein: Woody actually feels really pretty terrible. Realizing he would stoop this low to keep his place in the hierarchy, he kind of thought he was better than that. But at this point, no, he's not. 247 00:30:45.500 --> 00:30:57.689 Rona Gofstein: He's not so. They may be conflicted internally, they may be hopeful, they may be petrified. They all these emotions, you know, that are happening, and make sure those are there, too, along with the action of what they are doing. 248 00:30:59.500 --> 00:31:10.805 Rona Gofstein: All right. Oh, yeah, compelling emotion, decision on the page, on the page. You will be amazed every time an occasion when you're revising you. Go. Whoa! It's not there. 249 00:31:11.360 --> 00:31:20.509 Rona Gofstein: So I want you to, quickly. I'm going to stop for just a moment here, and as you think of you, we've looked at 3 of the temples, the opening, the hook, and the rising action. 250 00:31:20.980 --> 00:31:43.640 Rona Gofstein: Once you get to this point, as in your own division, look at them briefly, and make sure they kind of work together. Yes, you've got other things coming up between the scenes. You've got other scenes rather in between them other things will be happening. But can you see how these scenes connect? Can you see how your hook, how your opening connects to your hook connects to the rising action moment? 251 00:31:44.210 --> 00:31:58.479 Rona Gofstein: Because, if you remember the things in between were that because of that, things want to, you want things to fall in a logical pattern with a cause and effect trajectory. This happened. So this happened. This happened. So this happened. 252 00:31:59.011 --> 00:32:01.959 Rona Gofstein: When you're thinking about these polls. 253 00:32:02.000 --> 00:32:13.570 Rona Gofstein: Can you see the logic between them? I mean, yes, the other scenes will spell it out more clearly. But can you see that what happened in the rising action grows naturally out of what happened in the hook. 254 00:32:14.670 --> 00:32:18.069 Rona Gofstein: It won't be, I said, perfectly in line, but 255 00:32:18.810 --> 00:32:24.033 Rona Gofstein: it will it should. You should be able to see that again. That sort of structure. 256 00:32:24.880 --> 00:32:34.340 Rona Gofstein: if not, if you don't see that this could be a place that needs revision. And you need to add something to one of those scenes to make sure that they're going to, or you may 257 00:32:34.630 --> 00:32:52.399 Rona Gofstein: point out to. You may realize I needed to insert something between these scenes that there's there's a non 10 pole scene that needs to go in there that I didn't notice yet. But overall, you want to make sure that we can see how this arc this plot. Sorry how this plot is changing this arc. 258 00:32:52.680 --> 00:32:55.549 Rona Gofstein: how what's happening is changing the character and 259 00:32:55.580 --> 00:33:00.729 Rona Gofstein: pulling them, pulling them through. I apologize. I think all the caffeine has worn off. 260 00:33:01.130 --> 00:33:06.089 Rona Gofstein: so does what happened in your rising action. Adhesion, plot thrust, follow logically 261 00:33:06.750 --> 00:33:08.800 Rona Gofstein: from the hook an inciting incident. 262 00:33:09.610 --> 00:33:19.009 Rona Gofstein: Alright. The mirror moment the midpoint. I know people who actually can plot from this point, and there's a great book on it. By the way. This is the big change in direction. 263 00:33:19.540 --> 00:33:20.580 Rona Gofstein: So 264 00:33:20.600 --> 00:33:30.879 Rona Gofstein: it was all going well, and now it not now it's not. They thought things were going to plan, and something has gotten in the way. And they haven't learned everything yet. 265 00:33:31.410 --> 00:33:41.170 Rona Gofstein: Our our main character, our characters, have not learned everything yet. They haven't learned those lessons yet, so they're still making mistakes based on the wound and the lie. 266 00:33:41.614 --> 00:34:07.150 Rona Gofstein: They're still kind of tripping over themselves. This is a place in where your your characters, growth and your plot growth kind of collide. Up till now your characters been using their usual coping methods, the skills that they already knew to get through everything that they've needed to. Maybe they've been fumbling a lot and making mistakes. But yeah, they've been muddling through. They've been hopeful. They thought they had a the hang of this, and they they knew what to do. 267 00:34:07.150 --> 00:34:16.039 Rona Gofstein: And this point everything starts to change the lie, and the wound they believe get in the way, and it gets reinforced because of that. 268 00:34:16.664 --> 00:34:30.525 Rona Gofstein: This can be a place in some stories where a secret is revealed. New information is brought to light. The main character discovers a problem they thought they were solving is, they're actually been making it worse. 269 00:34:31.040 --> 00:34:39.440 Rona Gofstein: you, you want this to be a place where they? They've gotten distracted by a bigger goal that's 270 00:34:39.550 --> 00:34:43.129 Rona Gofstein: taken them away from what they should have been. Yeah, they forgot to keep their eye on the prize 271 00:34:44.900 --> 00:34:51.740 Rona Gofstein: and they're going to be really pressed up against their goal and their motivation, and everything feels hard and and 272 00:34:51.800 --> 00:34:53.890 Rona Gofstein: comfortable. And 273 00:34:54.380 --> 00:34:55.869 Rona Gofstein: oh, this is. 274 00:34:56.290 --> 00:35:05.799 Rona Gofstein: And I will tell you this is a place that can be hard for some writers to find. If you're not sure, I mean, you can literally open your book and see where the middle moment is. 275 00:35:05.930 --> 00:35:13.479 Rona Gofstein: If you can actually hit it literally at that point you're in great shape, but if you're not sure where the middle moment is. 276 00:35:13.990 --> 00:35:20.620 Rona Gofstein: look for a moment of the character's greatest pain, discomfort, or force change like. 277 00:35:20.710 --> 00:35:26.030 Rona Gofstein: do you remember writing a scene that you're just like? Oh, he's gonna hate me for this, or oh, this is uncomfortable 278 00:35:26.120 --> 00:35:30.830 Rona Gofstein: very frequently. That is where you're going to find your your middle moment. 279 00:35:30.920 --> 00:35:33.483 Rona Gofstein: It's going to be that place where 280 00:35:34.130 --> 00:35:46.939 Rona Gofstein: things got tough or something big was revealed. I had to get really vulnerable. I, as I said earlier, I write romance. I usually have love scenes very close to that middle moment, because everything's kind of cracking open. 281 00:35:47.330 --> 00:35:54.749 Rona Gofstein: so that's a place of great vulnerability for for characters. And of course, don't forget to make sure it's on the page. 282 00:35:54.770 --> 00:36:13.230 Rona Gofstein: Yeah, you hate me. I know it. Alright dark moment. Some people love writing dark moments. I I have to. Usually my editor usually says, Yeah, you shied away from this one again. I was like, but but it hurts. Yeah. So the characters about to lose everything, everything feels completely out of their control. They they! Why have I been doing this? 283 00:36:14.550 --> 00:36:18.579 Rona Gofstein: This is a time to look at? Is the moment as intense as you want it to be. 284 00:36:19.230 --> 00:36:33.739 Rona Gofstein: you know, when you get to the scene, when you're looking at the scene, make it big, make it dark. Make it crack open, you know. Have you pushed your main character to their most emotional point, and possibly in many cases their most physical point. 285 00:36:34.882 --> 00:36:40.149 Rona Gofstein: This is when they are pretty sure it didn't matter what they've learned. It's not going to work. 286 00:36:41.970 --> 00:36:57.530 Rona Gofstein: They are up against their internal goal and their external goal. Everything is at odds for them, everything. It's it's it's a it's a itchy sweater. They're gonna have to face the thing that they've been avoiding for 3 quarters of your book in order to learn their lesson 287 00:36:57.790 --> 00:37:03.880 Rona Gofstein: and reach their goal. Sacrifice, knowledge, power, all the things they've been trying 288 00:37:05.680 --> 00:37:15.219 Rona Gofstein: on the page. Does it seem like the motivation you've given them is strong enough to get them to and through this moment, if you haven't given them a strong enough motivation. 289 00:37:15.840 --> 00:37:22.816 Rona Gofstein: it would. You're going to fall apart here. You're going to realize that this scene doesn't feel as powerful. It isn't as weighty 290 00:37:23.450 --> 00:37:31.840 Rona Gofstein: because their motivation was like, yeah, sure, we could do this. Yeah, what? The heck? No, they've got to be driven so that when you put them through this moment. 291 00:37:32.370 --> 00:37:37.160 Rona Gofstein: and the reader goes through this with them. They are as agony with your character. 292 00:37:38.761 --> 00:37:46.278 Rona Gofstein: They may have just fallen back on an old pattern made an old mistake. They don't believe what they found or learned. 293 00:37:46.770 --> 00:37:48.260 Rona Gofstein: it's it's 294 00:37:48.410 --> 00:37:51.160 Rona Gofstein: it's everything that's at stake is coming in 295 00:37:51.556 --> 00:37:55.933 Rona Gofstein: the lie and the wound. Come, they are come! They're up against it. 296 00:37:56.630 --> 00:38:00.450 Rona Gofstein: And they're pretty sure everything they've ever wanted is completely and totally out of reach. 297 00:38:02.110 --> 00:38:08.440 Rona Gofstein: So they're making mistakes on the page they are bubbling, and then, of course, finding 298 00:38:08.610 --> 00:38:11.940 Rona Gofstein: the end of the dark moment is them finding the thing that they need. 299 00:38:12.090 --> 00:38:18.199 Rona Gofstein: and starting to turn it around. So make sure that that is what is on the page for all of this. 300 00:38:19.510 --> 00:38:22.980 Rona Gofstein: And you're a big Finnish. They live 301 00:38:23.430 --> 00:38:42.570 Rona Gofstein: well, hopefully they lived. Is it happily ever after? Not so sure. This is the big payoff. All right. This is the lesson learned. This is the goal achieved. This is the metal moment or the crowning moments. The lie is released. The conflict is over. This is where, when you're looking at this final 302 00:38:42.680 --> 00:38:44.909 Rona Gofstein: scene, this final tent pole. 303 00:38:45.120 --> 00:38:46.820 Rona Gofstein: You want to ask yourself. 304 00:38:46.870 --> 00:38:48.260 Rona Gofstein: did I deliver 305 00:38:48.340 --> 00:38:50.310 Rona Gofstein: on the promise of my book? 306 00:38:51.170 --> 00:38:53.639 Rona Gofstein: Did I deliver on the promise of my genre? 307 00:38:53.820 --> 00:39:01.699 Rona Gofstein: Did I deliver on the promise of that I set up at the beginning that this would be a story of a person who was going to face this 308 00:39:01.730 --> 00:39:03.250 Rona Gofstein: and overcome this? 309 00:39:03.440 --> 00:39:05.530 Rona Gofstein: Have they gotten that 310 00:39:05.550 --> 00:39:15.580 Rona Gofstein: your reader has taken this whole journey for you? And even if this is a finish, for now, if this is a duology or trilogy, or even longer. 311 00:39:16.060 --> 00:39:19.520 Rona Gofstein: You still need to stick the landing. You want this to be 312 00:39:19.600 --> 00:39:34.046 Rona Gofstein: powerful clear. Like, I said, we we get a lot of medal ceremonies in this moment. The possibility of happiness. You! You may snatch that happiness away with the inciting incident of the next book. I'm here for that 313 00:39:34.530 --> 00:39:37.710 Rona Gofstein: but you need to give them what they came here for this book. 314 00:39:39.330 --> 00:39:44.120 Rona Gofstein: And yes, you may have a moment after this, which is what's going to bridge them into the next one. 315 00:39:44.800 --> 00:39:57.829 Rona Gofstein: But in this conclusion, in this big finish make sure you've got it clear. And of course, on the page on the page. Have you? And has the conflict been resolved. 316 00:39:58.480 --> 00:40:03.459 Rona Gofstein: or as much of the conflict as can be resolved? In a 1st book, as I said, depending on the size of your series. 317 00:40:05.110 --> 00:40:11.150 Rona Gofstein: And always, as you're revising now, you're thinking like a reader. Did I give the reader what they came for. 318 00:40:11.910 --> 00:40:14.490 Rona Gofstein: because if you haven't, they're not coming back 319 00:40:16.260 --> 00:40:17.140 Rona Gofstein: alright. 320 00:40:17.870 --> 00:40:19.410 Rona Gofstein: All the scenes. 321 00:40:19.750 --> 00:40:43.140 Rona Gofstein: If you were doing a revision, you would now all to know these scenes in your book, you'd have them, you'd be. You've been strengthening them as you're revising them. You're like, okay. I needed to put more of this in here. I needed to put more that in here need more emotion. I needed more action. I needed more goal. I needed more conflict. I needed to strengthen the motivation in this scene. So you're going to see that they work together in a logical order. Hopefully, now that builds to the climax and the ending. Your reader wants 322 00:40:43.350 --> 00:40:47.239 Rona Gofstein: your because of that will work. You'll sort of see how they link together. 323 00:40:47.440 --> 00:41:02.240 Rona Gofstein: and that you've got a cause and effect trajectory that's going to work. These are the key moments. I hope you can see them. Once you've written them out, you should be able to see how they're holding up your novel, how they're pulling your reader through, and that they're allowing not only the plot to unfold, but your character arc to unfold. 324 00:41:02.850 --> 00:41:13.329 Rona Gofstein: So what's next is an another round of revision, and I know you may be groaning. But if you look at the picture you'll see that the 10 poles are connected. 325 00:41:13.950 --> 00:41:16.500 Rona Gofstein: They are not just standing there alone. 326 00:41:16.560 --> 00:41:19.989 Rona Gofstein: Everything in between are the scenes leading up to each one 327 00:41:20.030 --> 00:41:23.470 Rona Gofstein: and away from each one, and toward the next one. 328 00:41:23.580 --> 00:41:53.540 Rona Gofstein: and you now get to decide how you want to revise this. When I do this, what I find is I I notice if I've got big plot holes, or if something isn't strong enough, and once I know how strong, once I've got these key scenes strong enough, I'm able to make everything coming to and from them stronger. I write from the strength of that one scene and toward the strength of the next one. So now, if you're somebody who likes to do things linearly. This is your time, this, this next revision, because now you will go through 329 00:41:53.840 --> 00:41:55.740 Rona Gofstein: chapter by chapter by chapter. 330 00:41:56.360 --> 00:42:09.245 Rona Gofstein: Leaning into each of these things you'll start from your opening scene. You'll write and revise toward your inciting incident from there towards your rising action, and so on. 331 00:42:10.830 --> 00:42:25.279 Rona Gofstein: I do know writers who, when they do this before looking at the whole thing, they like to look at the scene before and after each of the 10 pulls first.st They still try to stay kind of high up before diving into on a scene by scene basis. They try to make sure those immediate ones are solid 332 00:42:25.891 --> 00:42:28.839 Rona Gofstein: but that's that's where they start. 333 00:42:29.543 --> 00:42:32.460 Rona Gofstein: Alright! Some quick bad news. 334 00:42:32.970 --> 00:42:43.879 Rona Gofstein: Sometimes we create arcs for more than one character. If you do that, it may work to do this by looking at the 10 poles for each character, so does each character have 335 00:42:44.170 --> 00:42:49.019 Rona Gofstein: an inciting incident and a rising action, and a midpoint, and a dark moment they may 336 00:42:49.040 --> 00:43:09.410 Rona Gofstein: be in the same scenes, but take a quick check if you do have more than 1 point of view character, if you have more than one character going through a change arc. Take the time, to look at this. So yes, it does make the 1st pass. Take a little longer, but I'm sure it also made writing your book a little more challenging. So you want to make sure you take the time to do that. 337 00:43:09.550 --> 00:43:19.889 Rona Gofstein: watching my time. Quick bonuses for you guys, I am of a the belief that if I learn something I want to be able to use it in as many ways and in as many times as possible. I want my 338 00:43:19.930 --> 00:43:32.330 Rona Gofstein: my sort of tools to do more than one job, so there are some other things you can do with this method. First, st you can create a synopsis. So for those of you who are thinking of trad publishing. If you write one paragraph for each of these 10 polls. 339 00:43:32.480 --> 00:43:36.220 Rona Gofstein: you were going to have the 1st draft of your synopsis 340 00:43:36.920 --> 00:43:59.678 Rona Gofstein: right? One paragraph. That's the opening scene, the inciting incident, so on and so on. You've got a strong beginning for that synopsis, and you have a line that you can follow. So you can actually use almost the Pixar rule number 4 to start that draft. This is one of the reasons why, knowing those key scenes will tell you a lot about your novel, and whether or not it's ready to do something like 341 00:44:00.220 --> 00:44:06.160 Rona Gofstein: Submit it somewhere else. And a bonus, too, when you're stuck. If you're not sure how to move forward. 342 00:44:06.320 --> 00:44:08.509 Rona Gofstein: go back to your last 10 pole scene. 343 00:44:09.520 --> 00:44:12.690 Rona Gofstein: write the words, look at the scene, and think. 344 00:44:12.720 --> 00:44:15.120 Rona Gofstein: think, or write the words I wrote right. But 345 00:44:15.690 --> 00:44:17.170 Rona Gofstein: because of that. 346 00:44:17.700 --> 00:44:20.630 Rona Gofstein: you know, I'm left on Mars. So because of that. 347 00:44:20.680 --> 00:44:22.270 Rona Gofstein: Mark has to. 348 00:44:22.890 --> 00:44:24.119 Rona Gofstein: And then just start 349 00:44:24.920 --> 00:44:27.962 Rona Gofstein: start brainstorming, start creating a list. 350 00:44:28.970 --> 00:44:44.599 Rona Gofstein: see what kind of comes up for you, or, if you know, sort of 2 tent poles. You know, start having fun with what could happen? What could get me from this point to this point? How can I get from A to B well, and as many ways to get there as you, the writer can think of 351 00:44:45.280 --> 00:44:49.638 Rona Gofstein: So if you've written the inciting incident, and the next one is the midpoint 352 00:44:50.150 --> 00:45:06.419 Rona Gofstein: what needs to happen to get them to that changing point? What could take the character there? And always go back? Think about their goal. Think about what's conflicting for them think about what's at stake for them, think about their lie, or what they need to learn, and you may be able to find a way to use this to get unstuck? 353 00:45:07.690 --> 00:45:12.390 Rona Gofstein: yeah, what? What? Poll? What will take your character to the next poll? Basically. 354 00:45:13.360 --> 00:45:17.895 Rona Gofstein: Alright, I know this was a lot of information, 355 00:45:18.630 --> 00:45:41.188 Rona Gofstein: and and then we squeeze it into about 45 min. So either you're feeling like you've been drinking out of a water hose or a a fire hydrant, or you're you're feeling pretty good. I I would like to think most of you are looking like you're cheering. I can't see you. I'm hoping but you know what you learned how to write a book. You did what it took to create this world, these characters, this concept, you can. 356 00:45:42.030 --> 00:45:42.930 Rona Gofstein: you can. 357 00:45:43.130 --> 00:45:47.839 Rona Gofstein: You can learn how to revise you can. You will find the process that works for you. 358 00:45:48.195 --> 00:45:56.189 Rona Gofstein: So I'm going to switch to questions. But before I do that I want to make sure I don't forget to do this. If you want more support. 359 00:45:56.963 --> 00:46:18.489 Rona Gofstein: For all you prowriting Aid Science Fiction Week attendees. I would love to help you to look through these again. And get you a little support. I work with authors to revise their 10 poll, review, their 10 polls and their rule number 4 answers. I look at both of those I send personalized feedback and we'll do a 45 min phone call to follow up, to discuss and get clear on your next steps. 360 00:46:18.900 --> 00:46:30.290 Rona Gofstein: I usually do that for 149 for you guys. It's going to be 49. So just make sure you put pro writing aid Sci-fi in the thing. Email me, the 10 postings and the rule number 4 answers that you've got, and any questions 361 00:46:30.390 --> 00:46:47.530 Rona Gofstein: to Rona Arona Govstein, and we will go from there, because this can be a really great basis for you to get through that process. That's kind of freaking you out a little bit. This is how you can stay in touch with me, and I am now going to start looking at my questions. 362 00:46:47.850 --> 00:46:50.500 Rona Gofstein: What is my opinion on 363 00:46:50.800 --> 00:46:55.220 Rona Gofstein: AI text to speech as a way to revise edit? I 364 00:46:55.600 --> 00:47:04.960 Rona Gofstein: don't think it's going to understand and capture these temples. I don't know that it you can. You can have a look at your temple scene, possibly, and maybe ask it. 365 00:47:07.050 --> 00:47:10.010 Rona Gofstein: is the. Is there a lot of emotion on the page? Or can you summar? 366 00:47:10.040 --> 00:47:13.120 Rona Gofstein: Here's a way I would consider using AI for this. How about this? 367 00:47:13.270 --> 00:47:18.662 Rona Gofstein: Find your 10 pole scenes, put it into, put the scene into an AI and say, 368 00:47:19.240 --> 00:47:21.279 Rona Gofstein: tell me, summarize this scene. 369 00:47:21.560 --> 00:47:30.209 Rona Gofstein: including the emotion, and if it doesn't give you a summary that tells you enough, and gives you enough of what you want that scene to have. Something's not on the page yet. 370 00:47:32.755 --> 00:47:33.860 Rona Gofstein: So 371 00:47:34.250 --> 00:47:42.889 Rona Gofstein: that would be, I think, a way to do to use AI to to help you to see if something's there, because it may be able to. It may able to help you see what's missing. 372 00:47:43.160 --> 00:47:45.409 Rona Gofstein: That's kind of my thought. 373 00:47:45.650 --> 00:47:57.769 Rona Gofstein: How would a character wound lie work for a static character like a superman or a wonder woman? That is a great question. It is much harder for them to have one. They I think what happens is they get more of the betrayal. 374 00:47:58.240 --> 00:48:08.609 Rona Gofstein: So they, Captain America and Superman and Wonder woman, believe in the goodness of people. And the what ends up wounding them is when people 375 00:48:08.630 --> 00:48:31.337 Rona Gofstein: aren't good when they don't do the right thing, when they act in a way that seems to be against their best interests, or that doesn't support the greater good. So that's going to be a rub for them. I think that's actually one of the great things in the 1st Wonder Woman movie. She just does not get. Why these people are are doing this, why, they're, you know, all but killing themselves. 376 00:48:32.210 --> 00:48:34.330 Rona Gofstein: So look to see what 377 00:48:34.970 --> 00:48:43.760 Rona Gofstein: what doesn't feel good to them, which would be, we're superman anything that's against truth, justice, and back then the American way. So 378 00:48:45.650 --> 00:48:53.480 Rona Gofstein: look to look to what's making them uncomfortable and making it hard for them maybe, to stick to that inner core 379 00:48:53.790 --> 00:48:54.959 Rona Gofstein: that they have 380 00:48:56.470 --> 00:49:02.394 Rona Gofstein: hope that helps does the number of rising moments matter. Is there a maximum 381 00:49:03.160 --> 00:49:13.214 Rona Gofstein: the when I'm talking about temples, I'm talking about that one big one. The one that has the most change in it from the inciting incident to the midpoint 382 00:49:14.440 --> 00:49:20.470 Rona Gofstein: Once you hit the midpoint, you're kind of on a downward, I mean, you may be still going up. Is there a number? 383 00:49:21.140 --> 00:49:34.830 Rona Gofstein: You know? The the answer is usually, no, there isn't a maximum. There isn't a minimum. If if you're writing epic fantasy, I know you guys are sci-fi. If you're writing like epic sizes you, you may have a lot of of moments. It may be turning almost episodic 384 00:49:35.130 --> 00:49:37.963 Rona Gofstein: but the the maximum is 385 00:49:38.770 --> 00:49:42.690 Rona Gofstein: You've hit too many when the reader is no longer interested in being pulled along. 386 00:49:43.172 --> 00:49:58.970 Rona Gofstein: And I hope that doesn't sound Flip, because that's that's not how I mean it. But you it needs to be enough. Oh, here's a nice, vague, very coach like answer. Just there needs to be enough rising moments to get you to the dark moment and to get you to the conclusion you want. 387 00:50:00.440 --> 00:50:01.500 Rona Gofstein: So 388 00:50:03.010 --> 00:50:22.639 Rona Gofstein: the that should help you, and I just saw I just wanted to peek into my chat really quickly. I know the slides went fast. And yes, I am sending those out to you guys will get those. You'll see all my slides and places to write information down so hopefully that will help you. On that. 389 00:50:23.021 --> 00:50:26.278 Rona Gofstein: Alright! What are my thoughts on prologues and epilogues? 390 00:50:27.520 --> 00:50:45.570 Rona Gofstein: I don't hate them either in books or in movies, but read your book without them, and see if they're absolutely necessary, especially for traditional publishing. you need to start the book where you are going to hook the reader the fastest, and if the prologue is going to be something that 391 00:50:46.600 --> 00:51:01.690 Rona Gofstein: is just, you kind of giving them the history of this world that might not be the place to do it. Because if you are submitting for traditional, you need to submit the prologue. You can't submit starting with Chapter one, and some agents only want 5 pages, so 392 00:51:01.720 --> 00:51:07.999 Rona Gofstein: think twice about them. Epilogues are actually, especially if you are linking to another book. 393 00:51:08.070 --> 00:51:14.254 Rona Gofstein: or hoping, you know. In other words, the book ends with the the climax and the wrap up and 394 00:51:15.080 --> 00:51:28.738 Rona Gofstein: the the conclusion of this book. And then the epilogue is, Oh, my God! We didn't kill it, or Oh, my God! He got away, or whatever it might be. So epilogues, I think, are more common and more 395 00:51:29.700 --> 00:51:42.600 Rona Gofstein: I think readers like them better. Your prologue has to have a really really good reason. To be there. So my thought is that when you look to revise, read it without it, and see if something is 396 00:51:42.870 --> 00:51:44.109 Rona Gofstein: truly missing 397 00:51:45.231 --> 00:51:53.039 Rona Gofstein: otherwise you can always give your prologue as a bonus or a reader, and sent Magnet if you're when you 398 00:51:53.100 --> 00:51:56.390 Rona Gofstein: are published and starting to create your newsletter list and things like that. 399 00:51:57.190 --> 00:52:03.259 Rona Gofstein: can. The main next question was, Can the main character come in a few pages later, but be mentioned in the 1st few pages. Yes. 400 00:52:03.590 --> 00:52:14.209 Rona Gofstein: yeah. I I know we don't like to talk about Harry Potter because of its problematic author. But Harry himself doesn't really. He's a baby, doesn't really appear at the beginning. What's important is the world? 401 00:52:14.590 --> 00:52:25.399 Rona Gofstein: And in fantasy that can be very important. And and that can definitely be true in in Science Fiction, that our opening scene is pulling you into this world 402 00:52:25.410 --> 00:52:28.118 Rona Gofstein: or this problem or this 403 00:52:30.680 --> 00:52:43.229 Rona Gofstein: This moment, for some reason, so they may not be there. If if they're not on there, then then they become the inciting incident. Probably their introduction becomes part of the inciting incident. So 404 00:52:43.670 --> 00:52:47.240 Rona Gofstein: let's make sure they're there soon, because again, they're what 405 00:52:47.320 --> 00:52:51.837 Rona Gofstein: they as much as the action are hopefully, what's pulling your your readers through? 406 00:52:52.210 --> 00:52:54.709 Rona Gofstein: as as writers, we don't get 407 00:52:54.890 --> 00:52:59.980 Rona Gofstein: visuals, and we don't get lighting, and we don't get soundtracks that 408 00:53:00.100 --> 00:53:10.670 Rona Gofstein: pull the the person in and keep them hooked, so we have to do it with what's on the page, so don't make them wait too long for the character that they're there to care about. 409 00:53:13.510 --> 00:53:16.810 Rona Gofstein: so the final scene does it have to be happy? No. 410 00:53:17.350 --> 00:53:26.419 Rona Gofstein: it doesn't. It depends on Hannibal. Lecter does get away, and I kind of love that he does at that point, which is brilliant storytelling. If you can get me to be happy that our villain got away. 411 00:53:26.470 --> 00:53:45.019 Rona Gofstein: Good on you. There are some some brilliantly motivated villains out there in in literature, and I am here for them. I absolutely I love a well motivated villain who I like root for on the sly a little bit. 412 00:53:45.883 --> 00:53:49.439 Rona Gofstein: So it doesn't have to be happy. It has to be 413 00:53:49.560 --> 00:54:01.570 Rona Gofstein: the right ending. Some books don't have happy, some books have satisfying conclusions. My younger son is a gamer and a big fan of the last of us. 414 00:54:01.710 --> 00:54:04.335 Rona Gofstein: and the 415 00:54:07.470 --> 00:54:08.740 Rona Gofstein: The second 416 00:54:09.000 --> 00:54:25.830 Rona Gofstein: version there was the last of us, too, and he wasn't sure about the ending. I'm like, did you like the ending? He goes? I don't think so, I said. Was it the right ending? He said that could be that it was the right ending, even if he didn't like it. 417 00:54:25.940 --> 00:54:33.600 Rona Gofstein: So don't worry about whether or not you have a happy ending. Make it the right ending. Give the reader the promise that they came for 418 00:54:33.896 --> 00:54:50.420 Rona Gofstein: and thank you. By the way, something I made a comment about Harry Potter, and someone said the author wasn't the issue. It's the intolerance that is absolutely true. That is the more important part. And thank you. Somebody who loved that game and the story. Yes, people got severely criticized for that the end. The writers got severely criticized for the end of that game. 419 00:54:50.750 --> 00:54:54.310 Rona Gofstein: and yet my son and his friends could not stop talking about it. So 420 00:54:55.110 --> 00:54:55.880 Rona Gofstein: that yeah. 421 00:54:56.000 --> 00:55:07.120 Rona Gofstein: yeah, see, that may have made it the right ending. If those folks couldn't stop talking about it, you couldn't stop talking about it, and you kept talking about it. Then it was the right ending 422 00:55:07.558 --> 00:55:19.250 Rona Gofstein: expiration date on the $49 special. You know what? I'm not going to put an expiration in. If you're in the middle of a draft right now, and 6 months from now you realize you want some help with your your revision process. Email. Me 423 00:55:19.270 --> 00:55:24.150 Rona Gofstein: absolutely just put in pro writing. It, put in September 2024. So in case my 424 00:55:24.300 --> 00:55:29.099 Rona Gofstein: brain has turned to a sponge. Then? 425 00:55:29.710 --> 00:55:43.070 Rona Gofstein: then, yeah, I will absolutely keep that open. So yeah, I would want you. You'll send me your your temple scenes and your Pixar rule number 4 fill out. And if I need any other pieces I will email you back and 426 00:55:43.220 --> 00:55:46.929 Rona Gofstein: we'll talk. And hopefully, you'll feel like you have a good handle on those 427 00:55:47.210 --> 00:55:53.748 Rona Gofstein: those scenes, because I hope you can see, and you can let me know in the chat. And I yes, fire hose. I I know 428 00:55:54.480 --> 00:55:58.479 Rona Gofstein: If you felt like pulling. If you can see how pulling out these scenes 429 00:55:58.780 --> 00:56:08.360 Rona Gofstein: could help you revise in a way you haven't thought of revising before, because I know when I started as a as a writer and I started revise. I started from chapter one, page one. 430 00:56:08.710 --> 00:56:09.820 Rona Gofstein: and 431 00:56:09.860 --> 00:56:10.950 Rona Gofstein: I 432 00:56:11.130 --> 00:56:23.419 Rona Gofstein: would get lost, I would get lost in a scene or a chapter, or I'd end up going back and forth, and it would take me forever. And this process as I started to to learn it and Hone, it really got me through that 1st revision faster 433 00:56:23.510 --> 00:56:29.480 Rona Gofstein: and clearer, and showed me really quickly where I had issues 434 00:56:30.598 --> 00:56:33.110 Rona Gofstein: and then from there 435 00:56:33.510 --> 00:56:36.950 Rona Gofstein: I was able to make the changes faster. And then the next revision. 436 00:56:37.530 --> 00:56:40.312 Rona Gofstein: because you do revise more than once. 437 00:56:40.840 --> 00:56:54.729 Rona Gofstein: Was that much stronger? And again, if you edit as as you revise as you write, if you edit as you write, you can use this too, so that when you do get to the end of the draft you've already hit those key scenes, and you know you've hit them and made them strong. 438 00:56:56.410 --> 00:56:59.290 Rona Gofstein: Oh, oh, good! Joe popped up. 439 00:57:00.340 --> 00:57:01.675 Rona Gofstein: My info! 440 00:57:03.250 --> 00:57:08.650 Rona Gofstein: Where to get the stuff, and the discounts, and all that good stuff, and how to follow me and how to find me. 441 00:57:08.660 --> 00:57:14.890 Rona Gofstein: I'm going to turn it back over to him. Thank you all for taking time out of your day and your writing time and your 442 00:57:15.790 --> 00:57:19.920 Rona Gofstein: possibly your workday to be here today. 443 00:57:21.890 --> 00:57:51.400 ProWritingAid: Okay, brilliant. Thank you. So so much. Runner, for generously spending your time and all of your wisdom for us. It was a really really interesting session. I think I speak for everyone. I say there's a lot to take away here. So thank you so much for spending your time with us, and thank you to all of you for joining us. For the session. It was another great one, as always. So just a quick reminder. You can find the replays to this session and all the other sessions in the Science Fiction 444 00:57:51.400 --> 00:58:15.230 ProWritingAid: writers. Week hub the link to which is in the chat now. I posted it just a second ago. So please do check it out there one more big. Thank you to Rona and all of yourselves for joining us. It was great, and we hope you can join us again for our next session. Thank you so much, folks, and we'll see you next time. See you later, guys. Thank you.